Cricket Walker

People often ask me if Haley ever gets sick of the camera.

Yup! Every now and then, she has no interest in it at all. On days like these, I am lucky if I get a shot of her throwing away garbage.
 

Thankfully my favorite funky duck is around to model for me! Just try and say that 3 times in a row. C’mon, I double dog dare ya!
 

Today I had a special model (my grandson, Alaki) who had no qualms about sitting around happily eating leaves while I clicked away.
 

And then this gorgeous river rat (Nutria) decided to distract me by showing up and flirting with me. What a charming rat! He reminds 
me a bit of a cowboy or two I have known in my life. (evil grin)
 

Ruh roh! Haley? Dang girl! You better be careful here cuz your niece (my granddaughter Triniti) looks like model material here. Lordy, this girl is a natural in front of the camera. Haley? Haley? You there???
 

Oh lordy! I don’t think this is Haley either! This adorable river rat is definitely trying to get my attention now. What a cutie huh? 
 

I can’t decide if my granddaughter McKenzi is squinting because of the sun or if she is growling at me, but she loves the camera!
 

Yeah, I realize this is not a duck, but he caught my attention anyway!
 

Oh goodness! Alaki is closing in for a kiss from his mama . . .
 

SIKE! At the last second he dodges away from the kiss and laughs!
 

I really have to do something about this duck addiction of mine.
 

And my addiction for converting pics to black and white . . .
 

I will join Ducks Anonymous tomorrow. Right after one more duck!
 

Sheesh! Even my river rat is giving up on me . . .

Some people visit Landa Park in New Braunfels to feed the ducks. Others go there to feed their tummies. I go there to feed my soul.

I was so certain that I didn’t have a destination in mind, but my heart seemed to know exactly where I was headed, back to the lake, back to where life made more sense to me, so many years ago.

Nope, you can never go back. I don’t think I was looking for that.

I just wanted to find the cliff, high above the lake, where I used to sit and unwind after a long week, a place where I could find my thoughts. Now and then, I think I even shed a few tears of frustration there. I used to believe that spot must be about as close to God as a person could possibly be.

Today, I stood there, at the highest point, just staring at the lake for a few minutes, once again, totally stunned by the pure beauty of the scene. I closed my eyes, raised my face to the sun, and felt the soft cool breeze through my hair, as the world went silent around me.

And then I smiled.

It was if someone had reached down and handed me a gift, allowing me, for right now, to live in the moment . . .

Every once in a while, I let Haley use my camera. It doesn’t happen often, because she has a nasty habit of turning it towards me!

It was soooooo windy. My hair just wouldn’t stay out of my face.

I was leaning on this map of the park and Haley was
trying to get me to smile. I was trying soooooo hard
not to crack up laughing. (The kid is nuts!)

What the heck? Yeah, her jokes (trying to get me to
smile) were getting pretty corny!

And then I lost it, totally busted out laughing, but my
eyes still have that “what the heck” look . . .

I have no idea what this scowl was all about, except maybe I just don’t like being in front of the camera. (smiles)

The kid caught every possible funky face all in one afternoon!

P.S. The sun was very bright, so I was doing a lot of squinting.

You know dang well that I was not gonna let this day pass without grabbing a picture of the kid right? Especially when she had this incredible emo look going on!

I love this shot of the kid. Way too cute!

25 things outside of my friends and family that bring me joy . . .

Long hot bubble baths
Rocky road ice cream
The GEICO Gecko (adorable)
Sitting at the edge of the river
Reading stories with happy endings
The taste of ice tea on a hot day
Photographing the world around me
Slow dancing
Kicking butt at air hockey
Life in the country
The smell of Eternity perfume
Watching the sun rise
The wind in my hair
Singing in the shower
Laughing at silly jokes
Watching puppies play
The smell of burgers on the grill
Long walks holding hands
Monkeys at the zoo
Playing in the rain
Writing from my heart
Strawberry cheesecake
Fields filled with wild flowers
Getting lost in music
A good cup of coffee

There’s always gonna be another mountain. I’m always gonna want to make it move. Always going to be an up-hill battle. Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose. Ain’t about how fast I get there. Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side. It’s the climb (Miley Cyrus Video)

There’s always gonna be another mountain
I’m always gonna want to make it move

Always going to be an up-hill battle,
Sometimes I’m gonna have to lose

Ain’t about how fast I get there,
Ain’t about what’s waiting on the other side

It’s the climb

When the world has gone crazy, I can always count on my kid to make me smile again, to help me understand what matters in life.

Excuse Me???????? (She got this look from her mama)

I have no idea what she is fixin to do with that soccer ball.

I close my eyes when she skates.

Awww… there is my sweet kid. Is she playing with her shadow??

Surrounded in a million unseen faces, all in such a hurry to go somewhere, anywhere. Or, maybe nowhere . . .

Suffocating in the mass of people.

Yearning for the nearly forgotten familiar feeling of southern tranquility, not understanding where it has gone.

So very afraid that I may never find it again.

Realizing that home isn’t here anymore, or maybe it never was.

Wondering where it is . . .

In a world which often makes very little sense to me, there is one thing I know I can always count on, the absolute killer smile of my kid.

Life could be falling down around us, and it doesn’t matter to her. She shuts it all out, puts on that dangerously wicked grin, and just enjoys the thrill of the slide. I am very blessed.

Texas has been good for the kid, but life is much the same. She still loves nature, especially around water.

She still loves to play in the park.

And of course, climb the monkey bars.

Her cell phone still rings way more often than mine does.

And, she still abandons me at the first sight of a skater.

The more things change . . .

Oh well, I can always go back to taking grass pictures.

At least the ugly adorable duck still likes me.

Over the last 18 months we have faced a roller coaster of challenges, triumphs, setbacks, heartache, and pain. Through it all, I have learned that I can choose to wallow in self pity, drown the sadness in brandy, or I can choose to make a DECISION to start truly living again, to pull myself up by the bootstraps and find my own happiness, somewhere deep in that open field within my soul.

I choose to start living again.

Now it is a matter of going through the steps that will make it possible.

1. Focus on raising my daughter, spending more quality time with her, while bringing joy and laughter into her life. This is usually as simple as handing the kid money and taking her shopping.

2. Get out of the apartment (and away from the computer) every single day, even if I just go for a 30 minute walk or swim in the early morning light, or spend time browsing through Borders. It may even be time to start another 30 day photo journey. It’s pretty tough to feel anything but joy while photographing ducks playing and bathing in the pond.

3. Get back in the gym again. One of the things I have missed most from Mississippi is my daily workouts at the gym and evening walks at the track. It always gave me time to work through the thoughts in my head, and just plain made me feel better.

Tomorrow morning I will be going with my son to join the local gym (Spectrum) here. Okay, I know it isn’t enough to join. Turns out it only works if ya actually go and do something beyond sitting in the lounge drinking coffee and watching the old guys sweat. So yeah, it time to put myself back on a daily workout schedule. Does this mean I get to go through the sore muscles all over again?

Should I order stock in Icy Hot now?

Look out folks, I am back …

“Here I go again on my own, goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known. Like a drifter I was born to walk alone. An’ I’ve made up my mind, I ain’t wasting no more time.” Here I Go Again (Whitesnake)

Have you ever had the feeling that you should have known, but then realize that somehow you knew all along, but didn’t want to know? You wanted the happiness so badly that you ignored that it just wasn’t right, it wasn’t meant to be.

I think sometimes we think that we can create the life we want for ourselves. We forget that there are some things that we have absolutely no control over.

Some of us (me) are simply meant to be alone.

There is no reason to fight it.

It just is …

Woah! Cricket’s gone pink? What’s up with that? Yeah, I don’t see me as a pink kind of girl either, so it takes something very important for me to decide to make my blog so pink. Any ideas? Yup, you guessed it. October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

“Breast Cancer Awareness Month is an annual international health campaign organized by major breast cancer charities every October to increase awareness of the disease and to raise funds for research into its cause, prevention and cure. The campaign also offers information and support to those affected by breast cancer.” http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breast_Cancer_Awareness_Month

I would like to challenge all of my readers to “go pink” on their own blogs for the month of October. If you don’t like messing with CSS, you can download the Breast Cancer Awareness Theme free of charge.

With only 23 days left until we see Mississippi in our rear view mirror, we decided to spend the day out on a long country ride taking pics.

Even though we faced some of the biggest challenges we have ever faced here, we will also be leaving some of our fondest memories, such as meeting friends who will now forever be family, and tequila brave midnight motorcycle rides. Of course that memory led to me spending hours drooling over Kawasaki motorcycles online.

Looking down over Grenada Lake.

Turtle soup?

Okay fine, I didn’t run over it, or cook the dang thing. Haley even gave him a gentle ride to the edge of the road so no one would squash it.

Lost in thoughts . . .

Uh huh . . .

Okay, so I am goofy. What’s your point?

Just for Mikey . . .

Did you see that?

Oh yeah . . .

Lord have mercy . . .

Ummmmm . . . Yeah . . .

Hey Mikey!

Okay, ya know dang well I had to convert one to black and white.