Ya think I’m too big for this?
[insert off key singing] I believe I can fly …
Hush mama! I’m looking at sumfin!
Oh yeah! I rock!
Do I look like Oscar the Grouch?
Security? There might be an issue in the Christmas department.
Vroooooom! Vroooooom!
Ruh roh. I think we’re fixing to get kicked out of here.
We are so busted mama.
Ya might wanna put the camera away now.
Haley Walker
Texas has been good for the kid, but life is much the same. She still loves nature, especially around water.
She still loves to play in the park.
And of course, climb the monkey bars.
Her cell phone still rings way more often than mine does.
And, she still abandons me at the first sight of a skater.
The more things change . . .
Oh well, I can always go back to taking grass pictures.
At least the ugly adorable duck still likes me. 🙂
Wouldn’t it be incredible to scratch your own back like that? WOW! Usually I wait til the middle of a post to get off topic.
Okay, what was it we were gonna talk about?
Oh yeah, back in the gym again. Well, actually they call this one a fitness center, which to me means it is just a little too fancy to be sweating in, but I like it well enough.
It wasn’t nearly as difficult to get back in the groove of working out as I expected. Yeah, I woke up with a few sore muscles this morning, but nothing a few tubes of Icy Hot and a half a bottle of Ibuprofen couldn’t handle. Okay, fine. I am just kidding. Well, sort of.
Cranking up the music (on my iPod) while working up to speed on the treadmill was a welcome feeling, almost like coming home.
Okay yeah, it helped a lot that the treadmills are situated in such a way that I had a perfect view of the southern boys working out on the free weights. Lord have mercy, I felt like a lil girl that someone had set loose in the candy store.
I have developed a new love/hate relationship with the Nautilus Treadclimber. OMG! Talk about a humbling experience!
After 30 minutes I was drenched from head to toe, my heart rate was over 140, and I was breathing like I had been climbing Mount Everest. I looked over at my son who hadn’t even bothered to break a sweat yet, his heart rate was a lil over 100, and he was casually drinking a cup of coffee, all the while working out at a level way beyond me.
Let’s just say I may owe the cuss jar a few bucks now.
When it was all over, I crawled to the hot tub and just sort of plopped myself in, while contemplating doing it all over again tomorrow.
Can I get away with parking in the handicap spot for a while? 😉
Over the last 18 months we have faced a roller coaster of challenges, triumphs, setbacks, heartache, and pain. Through it all, I have learned that I can choose to wallow in self pity, drown the sadness in brandy, or I can choose to make a DECISION to start truly living again, to pull myself up by the bootstraps and find my own happiness, somewhere deep in that open field within my soul.
I choose to start living again.
Now it is a matter of going through the steps that will make it possible.
1. Focus on raising my daughter, spending more quality time with her, while bringing joy and laughter into her life. This is usually as simple as handing the kid money and taking her shopping. 😉
2. Get out of the apartment (and away from the computer) every single day, even if I just go for a 30 minute walk or swim in the early morning light, or spend time browsing through Borders. It may even be time to start another 30 day photo journey. It’s pretty tough to feel anything but joy while photographing ducks playing and bathing in the pond.
3. Get back in the gym again. One of the things I have missed most from Mississippi is my daily workouts at the gym and evening walks at the track. It always gave me time to work through the thoughts in my head, and just plain made me feel better.
Tomorrow morning I will be going with my son to join the local gym (Spectrum) here. Okay, I know it isn’t enough to join. Turns out it only works if ya actually go and do something beyond sitting in the lounge drinking coffee and watching the old guys sweat. So yeah, it time to put myself back on a daily workout schedule. Does this mean I get to go through the sore muscles all over again?
Should I order stock in Icy Hot now? 😉
Look out folks, I am back …
“Here I go again on my own, goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known. Like a drifter I was born to walk alone. An’ I’ve made up my mind, I ain’t wasting no more time.” Here I Go Again (Whitesnake)
Have you ever had the feeling that you should have known, but then realize that somehow you knew all along, but didn’t want to know? You wanted the happiness so badly that you ignored that it just wasn’t right, it wasn’t meant to be.
I think sometimes we think that we can create the life we want for ourselves. We forget that there are some things that we have absolutely no control over.
Some of us (me) are simply meant to be alone.
There is no reason to fight it.
It just is …